Polly's Post-Exertion Malaise And More...

It's a thing with Fibromyalgia & ME, so it is. Post Exertion Malaise sounds like a rather grand term to describe what essentially is exhaustion, but that's telling it as it is not hyping it up . Another thing which is directly related to the condition is sleep deprivation. It's not known which came first, the chicken or the egg (c&e) but without a doubt it's heavily implicated...





So, what happens when you build up a tolerance to one of the two things which help with sleep and pain when in combination? Yep, an increase in pain and a decrease in sleep. Again this is the old c&e question! Some time ago I noticed that this had happened but had got into the rhythm and just went with it. I didn't do enough about it except up the pain relief with the result that when a huge administrative task came along at short notice I was able to survive on little more than a couple of hours sleep each morning. I'd wake somewhere around 7.15am and slip unnoticed into bed just before my partner's alarm went off! So, no guilt there then?








That's all fine, well and good but what happened next? It got even better as I took off to camp for a week complete with a laptop, a tonne of admin to catch up on, limited power and even worse data connection. Worse when trying to send data packages containing tickets, information and receipts, no, impossible. My thanks must go to Alan Moore Car Sales of Garryhinch for allowing me to sit in their foyer and make use of their signal, electricity, canteen and most importantly porcelain toilet & hot running water!

 The field I spoke of lies more or less directly opposite their family business. We had no facilities for the first 3 days of our stay due to a business issue with the rental firm who had agreed to supply us with portaloos, lighting towers, etc. Disgraceful behaviour on their part which will be dealt with in the most strenuous manner possible, angelic behaviour on the part of our friendly car dealer over the road! I was the lucky one; I'd five scouts and one leader over the road who were making use of natures own toilet until on the evening of day 3 portaloos secured from a different rental firm were delivered.

By then we'd already taken our scouts into the local swimming baths for a well deserved shower & a sh*#! Being honest citizens we'd owned up to our intentions and our plight which resulted in a huge discount off the entry fee. They were then clean enough to be in a position to go to the movies for the evening where they enjoyed the spoils of popcorn, soft drinks, soft chairs, etc and more trips to the porcelain before bed time! All the time I made good use of the free wifi in the foyer and enjoyed my complementary cola. Oh joy. My forensic accountancy skills abound. The money that got lodged into non-existent PayPal accounts was located & cash delivered. 

 The absence of lighting towers on site meant that in our absence the truck delivering the portaloos drove in an arc to get in and out of the site (around the dead truck in the centre of the gate.) He took out most of the campsites that had taken two solid days to mark out with rope and short fence poles! Just imagine the reaction upon our return after our jaunt to the movies!!!! Fur & feathers flew...

Anyone monitoring the emails I was sending during this period will attest as to the mad hours I was keeping. This said, it did at least give me something to do while suffering with my insomnia! Once the pressure was off though, I just folded. My friend is inclined to say that I just felt as though I was (and still am to a large extent) broken. This is hardly surprising given the truly difficult circumstances that we were immersed in up until Friday afternoon. Aside from the portaloo problem, there were bundles of harris fencing still to be removed from the site following BARE in the Woods, a ruddy great articulated lorry wedged knee deep in mud just inside the gate (ie its axels).

Numerous other issues included torrential rain, a lack of equipment and time, exhaustion and panic that we wouldn't get things finished in time, 50 scout groups arriving more sodding admin to allow registration before admission onto the site from 12noon on Friday.Thankfully by that time the truck had been dragged out of the field leaving yards and yards of black skid marks for our visitors to follow in case they got lost! The muddy craters left by the lorry were railed off and the one way system was now in place.

I can barely remember the weekend we'd spent so long making happen, not least because of late arrivals meaning that those of us on registration were parked inside the gate of the camping field meaning that we missed the two big acts we'd booked on Friday evening! Bloody Aslan and Big Generator, I ask you?! There's something not right about that one. For my non-Irish friends Aslan were HUGE over here and apparently Big Generator weren't too far behind either...

Finally we got to go home. I truly enjoyed the weekend, for a number of reasons. It's nice being a part of making something like a music festival happen, meeting new and old friends, knowing that the kids and the adults had a great time! If it weren't for that I'd truly be questioning my sanity as the last few weeks have been a living nightmare and I'm well and truly spent.

My appetite's slowly recovering. I'm weaning myself off the Marlborough, having broken my 3 1/2 year fast due to the physical, emotional and mental stress. I'm still burning hot and then cold. I've managed to spend a few hours destressing in the garden and finally dug some of the many shrubs and perennials into the ground and done some weeding. I've chopped and cut at the wildest of bushes overhanging the road and I've made myself incredibly sore while enjoying what equates to freedom for me right now!

There's so much more to do, but I'm getting there if a little slowly. Poor DG had to clear off the debris from the path for me as that's one job I find too hard on the best of days. The garden is beginning to look nice. It really does. It would be nice if inside were the same. My home is still filthy; dirty and untidy, with washing that still needs to be caught up on but at least I'm able to cook for himself after a day's work rather than the other way around! It's the least I can do (unless I can persuade someone else to do it for us) ...

I've a few days away soon when I will fully recharge my batteries and then I can play catch up with the satisfaction that those few weeks of hell made something amazing happen! Was it worth it? Yes. But next year if I gain a tolerence to my medication I'm not going to let myself get so run down in advance of a big committment again. I've learnt the hard way. I need to be fitter in every way before it all kicks off again!

Polly...